PARADISE LOST

A humming bird hummed. It’s tiny wings fluttered so fast they seemed in perpetual motion. A loud rat-a-tat-tat startled me. I looked up, looked around, knew what the noise was but couldn’t spot the red-headed woodpecker. It must have found a cache of worms and was eating as fast as he could. The sun was shining. I could almost hear the grass growing.

Miss Connelly was walking down the concrete path pushing her white cart of medications. She waved to me, gave me a sweet Giaconda smile and kept going.

I watched her stop at Stephan’s. He was angry about something. No big deal he was always angry about something. His pen had disappeared. Miss Connelly got down on her hands and knees and found the pen hehad dropped under his chair. Stephan grabbed for it but had his hand lightly slapped. ‘Here, swallow your medication and I’ll give your pen back.’ He swallowed. Stephan is a lost soul without his pen and writing book.

On Saturdays each patient performs in some way. Stephan is always ready to read aloud one of the stories he had labored over the entire week. One time the rest of us couldn’t stop laughing. Not one of us understood a word of jabberwocky except him. He rattled on for 15 minutes. We laughed for 20. When at last his glib tongue slowed down, his eyes rolled to the back of his head, he bowed and thanked us for our applause. Sudden silence and he hurried back to his room to start another story.

Brenda, my almost friend, was anxiously waiting for her afternoon dose of Valium. Her mother warned her to stay calm, take her medicine or she will never visit again. If Miss Connelly would allot Brenda ten times as much as she was allowed, Brenda would swallow every pill non-stop. She desperately wanted to go home. A silence, a lovely silence surrounded me. Robins, sparrows pulled up earthworms from the fertile soil. I was comfortable, content. A big robin near me must have been a male. It was twice the size of the other birds. It’s bill almost smirked as a juicy worm curled around its beak. A robin spread its wings and flew above the trees. The sky got bluer and bluer. Miss Connelly stood between the birds and me. I opened my mouth wide and my pill was put went in. It was small, blue almost the color of the sky. I swallowed the soft gelatin thing without my apple juice. The juice slid down my throat and refreshed me.

The blue sky moved closer to the earth. It was glorious. A red, red robin cocked its head at my feet, hopped up on my lap and sat there quietly. We studied each other. I touched its wings and was surprised to find how lightweight and hollow the bones were. That set the wings to grow bigger, stronger. The red breast puffed. I stood up and the beautiful bird came down to me, nudged me onto its back. He began to chirp, tweet, sing as I settled in for a ride.

Below me Stephan was writing. Brenda was trying to finagle another pillfrom Miss Connelly. The bird flew me to its nest, let me see the blue eggs about to crack open. I saw the woodpecker that I couldn’t find this morning. Robin swooped. He was taking me home. ‘Don’t. Don’t, not yet,’ I cried.

Someone touched my shoulder. Brenda, my almost friend, was behind me. ‘Where did you get all those feathers? Did you kill some birds? I won’t tell.’ And she never did. She wangled too many Valiums and never went home. I’m still here waiting for a turtle dove or a green cardinal to give me another ride.

Be nice and I’ll take you along.