I'm getting older--and bolder! (FOOLS RUSH IN)

I know very well there are eight wide steps with wide railings to my brownstone apartment on 35th St. Most likely I’ve been up and down them a million times in the year since Haley and I began sharing our comfy apartment. We have been friends forever, back to college days.

 

As usual I looked behind me before putting my key in the lock and did  it again tonight. But I guess I wasn’t careful enough because I heard what sounded like someone jumping over the balustrade. Then I felt something in my back and screamed, ‘Don’t shoot. Don’t kill me. I’m a writer!’ ‘You’re a what?’ a soft pleasant male voice said. ‘A writer- a writer. Here take my purse.’ The gun came away from my back. ‘ I sternly told the person I won’t even turn around, he should just go away. I managed to see a black hand fumble through my bag and then toss my belongings on the step near the door. ‘I don’t want your purse,’ he said. ‘Are you Shirley, Shirley the writer? You must be. I’m Clinton, Haley’s new, shall we say ‘roomer?’

 

I’m still scared. Haley never mentioned Clinton. I’m not letting him in without her okay. ‘Clinton, I want to buzz Haley so we can get in. I won’t tell her you’re here but will say I lost my key.’ ‘Go ahead. It’s getting cold out here.’ I buzzed two longs, one short and there was no reply. Clinton knew that. I suggested we go to the corner coffee house to wait for Haley but he only want to go upstairs to be comfortable. This was awkward but I held my ground. ‘Either we go for coffee, a hoagie or stand here all night. I was angry. ‘Mr. Clinton, or whatever his name was, grabbed my arm and told me in no uncertain terms to unlock the door. Somehow I still had the key in my hand. Without blinking and faster than the little gray mouse that lives in a hole in our wall, I threw the key as far as I could towards the street. It clunked some distance from the curb but couldn’t be seen from where we stood.

 

Idiot that I was, I pretended to have Simon Legree’s long black moustache and snarled at Clinton, ‘You are foiled, Sir. Leave before I sic a policeman on your foul head.’  His reaction was not what I semi-expected. From nowhere I thought he had produced a box cutter and my neck was what he was going to cut. Instead, he burst out laughing. ‘Jenny, you are not a writer. You are a comedienne. Come on, let’s find your key.’ I was indignant. ‘You go find it. I didn’t throw it away because I felt like scraping my knees on the red brick pavement.’ Darn if he didn’t go looking for it. In the meantime, I felt in my purse and found the spare key in the make-up spot. I got it and left him in the semi-dark evening. Once upstairs I called for the police right away. If there was a siren, I never heard it. My ears are attuned to let them pass in silence.

 

Our buzzer rang, two long, one short. That had to be Haley. I buzzed her in. The sound of her key in our apartment door felt calming.
‘Hi, Doodle, look who I found crawling over our pavement. This is Clinton. He’ll be staying in my room with me until he doesn’t.’ Clinton smiled to me and told Haley we had met ouside.

 

This had been my night to fix supper for Haley and me but I had been side-tracked. I suggested we go out for pizza, my treat. Haley went in her room to wash up, change her clothes. Clinton, unconsciously asked me to relax, pointed to the sofa. I sat. He sat next to me, almost on my lap and expressed himself right away by groping my breasts. My indignation flared for a minute, only a minute, as I realized it felt good and I was overly excited. That doesn’t mean I told him to stop.

 

Haley’s heels clicked on the wooden floor. Clinton adjusted himself. I straightened my skirt. We moved apart on the sofa before Haley came in. She said, ‘I’m ready.’ Smart aleck Clinton said,’ I’ve been ready waiting for you. I need a shot of Jack Daniels before we go.’ ‘We young ladies don’t have hard liquor here. Lets’ go tie one on with Chianti  at the pizzaria.’

 

We did just that, almost wobbled down the few blocks to our brownstone. Haley didn’t ask for my key and used her own. Upstairs we three used Haley’s room together. It had been a great nite after all.

 

I went to the hardware store the next day to get a new key for myself and one for Clinton. He already learned that Haley has the nite shift on Thursdays.