Danger? SENT IN - ONE CLOWN

I walk alone. The streets are dark, empty. My heels click on the broken sidewalk. For me to imagine I am fearless, would be folly. Adrenaline flows hard and destructively like lava down Mt. Vesuvius. Tonight is my first big battle, my self-challenge to serve, to beat the odds. I have studied Tai Kwon Do and have mace tightly held in my hand. From my unzipped purse I can reach the small, but effective and licensed hand gun I bought 2 weeks ago. I have practiced, feel confident I can use it if I have to.

 

A heavy step behind me moves quickly, passes. The man is not interested in me but I am interested in him. I watch closely as he reaches the corner, crosses  back. A fast turn of my head and he is one block behind me. It’s not like me to sweat but I feel a wetness under my arms, on my forehead, my nose. ‘Don’t speed up. Don’t let him feel your fear,’ I tell myself, but am losing control. A smartness in a mind I didn’t know I had wakes me up. ‘Fool. Do you want to die? Cross the street to the lit pharmacy on that corner. Take refuge.’ The thumping heart tells me to listen. The determination I have been taught tells me ,’walk on. Be ready!’

 

And I am ready. I walk alone on the dark side of the street, hear what sounds like the same heavy step getting closer. ‘Pull yourself together. They are not the same. His heels scrape as if he has a slight limp. Let him pass you.’ I take a deep breath, lean on a parked car to wait for the limper to go away, but he seems to have  evaporated into thin air. I look behind me, stare straight ahead.

 

Only two loud teens, maybe coked out, are laughing, coming my way. I give them room to pass, but not enough. One grabs my purse. The other grabs me, knocks me down on the cold pavement. I scream and he hits me in my mouth. Not a soul sees or hears me. He jumps on top of me, starts to rip off my clothes. Blood fills my mouth. My Police Cadet badge falls in the gutter.

 

I lie still and see a huge clown balloon rise above me. It bumps into a bent maple tree. Air hisses out as it falls over me. We die together.