THIS LITTLE PIGGY
My 'surprise' 21st birthday party is set at the Algonquin for Oct. 1. I am alerted when my mom asks me to help her find a new gown for Dad's initiation dinner into the Mason Lodge. Why all of a sudden? She doesn't need me as she is a stunner, only nineteen years older than I am, and her double closet bursts with dresses, suits, gowns worn once or twice and then relegated to the end of the row. Another clear hint that something is up is my dad has never mentioned the Masons before except in revulsion, nor has he ever joined any political group.
I'm on to Mom, am quick with an excuse not to attend the Mason dinner. Just to annoy her I tell Mom Evan's cousin Nancy is getting married that afternoon and we already accepted the invite. Mom's face grows cold, long. Her hands shake a little and her long face turns white, then red. 'Holli,' she exclaims. 'Dad has a new tux and absolutely must be at the Mason dinner. It starts at eight. Can't you leave the wedding reception before that?' She goes on and on. 'Hell's bells, you and Evan will already be dressed right. All you have to do is be careful not to spill anything on your dress.' I cannot hold back my laugh and give her a thread of hope that maybe we can make it.
I am positive that Evan has no idea I am on to the subterfuge my parents are planning for me. He shows me the invitation to his cousin's wedding and asks to confirm I'll go with him. I act excited, tell him about the Mason dinner and we can go to both affairs. He gives me a warm, tight hug and the subject is dropped.s dropped.
By September 20 my Mom starts nagging me to shop with her as so far she hasn't found anything appropriate for Dad's standing. I beg off until she pulls her ace. 'Holli, Dad and I want you to look extra nice. Did I tell you he is one of five inductees and will be making a short speech? We'll treat you to a new dress this time.' Ordinarily I select my own clothes and pay for them myself, but this time I give in.
Mom wants something smart, stylish, body hugging, a little on the sexy side. 'Mom, don't you think those men are at least Dad's age. What kind of sexy do you mean?' She comes at me full force. 'Holli, I dress for me, not men. I don't intend drying up like a sliced apple that turns brown overnight.' We tramp from one boutique to until she smiles at a clinging, simple silk gown in a pale cream shade. I don't dare tell her the neckline is a little too daring. Thin rhinestone straps are the only adornment. The skirt is slit to her knees. She could easily be my sister.
The specialist saleslady brings out a soft, svelte, pale blue gown for me. There are peacock feathers near the hemline. The bodice is deep but not as deep as Mom's which is no problem as she fills hers out better than I fill mine. Mine she adds to her personal charge account. As we leave, Mom is humming 'It's a lovely day today,' and keeps humming until we get home.
October 1 seems to come right after September 20. Our dresses have been altered to perfection. Dad has new patent leather shoes for his tux. Evan and I leave for the wedding at noon. I feel slightly over-dressed in my gown, am careful not to spill anything on it or snag the peacock feathers. It is a lovely wedding. The young couple have been in love since high school. I, and I believe Evan, may be getting thoughts of our own about marriage but have not yet said anything definite.
As we say goodbye to the newlyweds, Evan's family, I begin to get a case of nerves. Am I going to be able to act, be surprised, overwhelmed like Meryl Streep, Judi Dench, anybody besides myself?
As we say goodbye to the newlyweds, Evan's family, I begin to get a case of nerves. Am I going to be able to act, be surprised, overwhelmed like Meryl Streep, Judi Dench, anybody besides myself?
Compliments keep coming. I become Super Woman, relax, dance, have fun. The buffet dinner is gorgeous, sumptuous. My Mom has out done herself. Dad is dancing with one of our neighbors. I happen not to have a dance partner at the moment and wonder where Evan is. I sit down at our table and nibble,fill myself on chilled, delicious steamed shrimp. Dad comes and sits beside me. 'Dad, where is Mom?' 'Probably in the ladies' room, Holli.' I pardon myself and go to find her. And I do! She is in a dark corner near an exit door. Evan is with her, pushed up close. Her dress is raised and Evan is sweating. I can't believe what I am seeing. I sneak away quietly, tell my father that I couldn't find her. h
My mother, my dear, beloved mother has been my father's wife for thirty years. I have been in love with Evan for one year and my mother has taken him away from me. Nonchalantly she returns to our table. I look straight into her face and go 'Oink, Oink,' tell her I release her from being my mother. Call her a pig, a thief.
My mother, my dear, beloved mother has been my father's wife for thirty years. I have been in love with Evan for one year and my mother has taken him away from me. Nonchalantly she returns to our table. I look straight into her face and go 'Oink, Oink,' tell her I release her from being my mother. Call her a pig, a thief.
Writhing inside, I play out my surprise party, thank my guests, am forced to ride home with my parents. I make up some ridiculous story about Evan having to leave early. For my Dad alone, I bubble, hug him, thank him for the lovely party.
If he notices I don't talk to my mother, he says not a word. Maybe he knows what I know and this was not her first time
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