Class Dummy?

THINKING CAP

 

Miss Bartlett opens the creaky door to let bright sunshine into my eyes. It takes a few minutes for me to see my classmates lined up in their desks like robots. At first there are snickers, then loud laughs. I am quite sure she hates me and the rest of our third grade class. She has a few favorites like Rosa, Dorothy, Chuck and Thomas. They usually get to wash the blackboards, answer easy geography questions. The tough ones get thrown at me, like where is Vladivostok, how many moons does Jupiter have. Of course, I don't know the answers, nor do any hands rise, wave to reply. She is on my back again, gets the tall white dunce cap out of the cloak room, puts it on my head and leads me into the darkness. 

 

I yell thru the door, 'Miss Bartlett, 'I'm not a dunce. I'm not! Let me out of here.' The rest period bell sounds and I am grateful to be let out of the dungeon for the fifteen minute recess. A temporary relief is better than none. I must stand in a corner while she puts the dunce cap on me again, leads me directly into my 'punishment cell' Laughter works its way under the door into my unhappy world.

 

Amazing. I am almost dumbstruck. I can tell by the sound of Miss Bartlett's clunky shoes, that she is about to free me. Mistake. The door opens and in comes cry baby Johnny Walker. Forever, I listen to him boo hoo. It is a bit better than hearing, or feeling mice nibbling at my shoe strings. He sits in one corn, I in another. Our toes almost touch diagonally across the rough wooden floor. My dunce cap is on the floor, Johnny is on my nerves.

 

'What the heck', Johnny lets do something. How about we feel thru the coat pockets, maybe find something interesting, maybe some milk money or a left over cookie.' Together we crawl from side to side of the little cloak room.  I find a nickle in what feels like a girl's coat. She won't miss it so it goes in my pants pocket. My cell-mate Johnny taps on the door, calls to Miss Bartlett, 'Please let me out. I have to go pee pee.' The class roars with laughter. Restraint is not my strong suit. I laugh too.

 

As soon as the door is opened for him, I push my way out and wall slowly over to my regular desk. The look on my teacher's face should be captured on film. Standing straight and 5 feet tall, I look right into her bewildered face.

 

' Miss Bartlett, I have the answers. Vladivostok is in eastern Russia and Jupiter has four moons and two satellites that are in orbit around it, taking ten earth years a revolution. There is a stillness, a lovely silence. Next she applauds, congratulates me, tells the class I am not a dunce, am surely going to be a scientist one day. She applauds and urges the class to follow her lead. I bow low and sit down. One day she will realize how smart I was to trick her so completely. If she asked me to spell Vladivostok, I couldn't do it, nor do I have any inkling about Jupiter's moons and satellites.

 

I dream about this day time and time again and think that maybe I will be a scientist. I'm definitely smarter than my teacher.