THE NEW MRS. RIPLEY

If you cannot believe the unbelievable, read no further. In this case, I swear to you every word you read is true. For those who are still with me, I begin.

My new born babe, Star, has come home from the hospital today with blond hair and the de rigueur large blue eyes. Her father is either Larry or Marc. Marc has agreed to take the paternity test and if Star is his, he will take responsibility. Larry will be tested if Marc is not the daddy. One has to be correct. There were no others. So far, I hope some of you hangers on are still here. Ready?

Star talks! I don’t mean gurgles, makes unidentifiable noises. She actually speaks. Her voice is soft and steady. Already she has told me what it was like to be in the dark in my belly, how she learned words to Rock-a-bye Baby. Coming out was hard, taking her first breath of delivery room air gagged her.

Both Larry and Marc saw her in the hospital, heard her loud cry. At that early time, Star had not yet spoken to me. It happened the first time when I laid her in her new crib. Nobody else was with me so it had to be Star saying, ‘Ma Ma,’ not at all like a doll says Mama. I laughed at my own foolishness, picked her up and kissed her tiny white throat. I looked around again and heard someone say, ‘Do it again.’ This time I did not take my eyes off of Star and actually saw her pink lips move as she said, ‘Thanks.’

In the mirror, I didn’t look insane. Am I going thru some sort of post partum phase? Should I call my OB? All he can tell me is to get hold of myself, take a tranquilizer and get some rest. I give that some serious thought and file it. No sense calling him or anyone else. What is happening is unbelievable.

Star empties her warmed 3 oz. of formula, gives a burp and clearly says, ‘More.’ I sit beside her crib a long time, watching, listening. There is only silence. For no reason I can find, she starts crying, stops and asks, ‘Who is my father?’ This is too much. It is insane but I reply, tell her the truth. ‘I’m not sure.’ Star cries harder and harder, kicks until she knocks her bootie between the crib bars and it falls on the floor.

Star has now gained 5 pounds, can turn over. When Marc comes to see her, she looks at him and asks, ‘Are you my father?’ He is stunned, thinks I am playing a trick on him, only says ‘NO’, turns and leaves without as much as a so long to me.

By day four I believe I am going crazy. Dr. Perry, Star’s pediatrician who checked her out in the delivery room, has to know about this, find out what is happening. His secretary hears my anxiety and connects me to him. I explain what I see, hear and he thinks I should call a psychiatrist but will stop by about 5 after he closes his office.

As soon as he sees Star he knows she is too big for her short life, should not be able to roll over and tells me to take her to pediatrics at the hospital immediately. He’ll meet me there. I look upward and thank the lord somebody believes me, get Star into a safety seat and go.

Several doctors are waiting in the lobby for us, tossing questions at me too fast for me to answer. A crib with metal bars waits for Star. I am given lots of papers to sign. I have told Dr. Perry what happened, when, changes, everything I know and all he tells me is to stay in the lobby until I hear from someone. I stay, fall asleep a few times, go to the desk to find out if there are any messages from Dr. Perry. ‘No, not yet.’

Star is 7 days old and still being prodded, tested. No one in the nursery has heard Star speak yet, except Dr. Perry who tells me I must be tricking him. I am not believed. Doctors from out of state are coming in to see my ‘freak’. I am given one short visit with her a day and must wear a gown, rubber gloves and a mask. Star has pulled herself up in the crib and can stand. Dr. Bernard from Chicago has a tape recorder with him constantly and he picks up Star saying ‘Hi, Ma.’ That was all. It clunked and died. I blow my baby, already as developed as a 10 month old, a kiss and drive home.

For whoever has come this far with me, you can leave now. Whatever there is to be told at this point, I have told you. Just believe it as it is isn’t over yet. When an explanation, an answer is found, keep your eyes and ears open to CNN. It is going to be a show stopper.